pictures of the family

Celebrating the Annibirtary* long-weekend:

Rigby, excited over a paper plate**. You will note she now sits w/out help, she also has a teeny tooth AND is more adorable than a basket of puppies in her wee smocked dress (a gift from afar).

Sebastian, whose bright smile masks a most mischievous mind. He had a ball stealing the spotlight from the guests of honour. He was really sweet and polite on this long and warm afternoon.

Me, my awesome new hair and glasses (and top). My tits are *huge*, when did that happen? Once I'm finished breastfeeding, there will be a kick-ass tattoo on my left arm.

I feel pretty lucky to be married to this guy. He's funny, sweet, loving, competent and incredibly good-looking.
Happy Anniversary, Baby!!

*

















** yes, we did use paper plates. From IKEA, even. They were left-over from Sebastian's party and didn't leave me with much guilt, the rest of the party was pretty "green" and I did not buy any *new* disposable goods.

who has time for hope?

Trapped in the mundane, I ask myself how I can possibly hope for things to change dramatically enough. Today I attempted to explain to my three-year-old why polycarbonate bottles are bad. It did not go as well as I may have hoped, but I think that's okay.

It made me think, though, about being a parent. The awesome responsibility of it all - our necessary dedication to the well-being of these strange little people. And all the work that entails. I've been researching alternatives to public school (much to my mother's dismay - I do see her point, but wonder if a system so broken is worth getting behind). I know I have sometime, I also know that time behaves differently once you have kids. Over coffee the other evening, my friend Diane said of life with a family: "The days are long, but the years are short."

She's right. In the blink of an eye I went from young, carefree member of a young, carefree couple to one of a family of four, with a responsibility to three other humans. Striking some kind of balance when tending to the needs of four people is tough, I am making a go of it, though.

In four years I have learned so much about myself. I have truly amazed myself with my range of capabilities and I've discovered some surprising aptitudes. I am also beginning to see that the balance I seek may be an illusion. Not that balance is an illusion, but balance without sacrifice and compromise is. There are only so many hours in one day, only so many things any one of us can do.

But that's not all it is, is it? We repeat that mantra all the time, the one about there not being enough, but then we sit in front of our screens and zone out. We spend hours dreaming and dreading, we spend scarce minutes actually working. Well, some of us do. Others of us work and work and work in order to avoid thinking and dreaming (and dreading). And then even more of us swing between both patterns. Some people, rare people, just do. Yeah, weird, eh?

Actually, I want to be a doer. I do. I think I do. But it is so easy to write off the things I want to do and try as being too difficult, "especially given [my] current situation." i.e. Having two kids under the age of four. And I don't discount the idea that my days are very full of the mundane, leaving little time for other pursuits, especially if there's much planning needed. And sometimes I even appreciate having a pretty valid reason for being a flake, but then at times it becomes an excuse for me to get my lazy on.

Once it's an excuse the guilt starts pouring in. I pride myself on being a person who doesn't usually succumb to unnecessary guilt, but sometimes it is a good indicator. It tells me that maybe I'm not trying. At least, I think that's what it is trying to tell me. Recently it has taken to yelling at me and I have lost a bit of it's message.

I have lists (of course I do) and I am in that place where just consolidating my lists and getting a feel for where I am seems too daunting. I've made some headway, nibbled at a few edges, given myself enough peace to get a little sleep, but if I am to be completely honest with myself, I've been wandering around, doing a half-assed job of looking busy.

Part of me just wants to sleep, but I have been sleeping and I have not been feeling much better for it. I'm getting exercise, eating pretty well, taking my meds... and still... not feeling much better. I think I need an overhaul, but this time not of my stuff but of my back burner. Get it all out, sorted and re-filed. And scratching a few choice items off my list.

Today I did get some of the cleaning bits off my list. My friend Deanna came over and lent a hand - for which she was well-fed - it was a really lovely day filled with laughter and productivity. Most weekends I send Andrew and Sebastian off so I can clean up, after which I feel resentment because they had fun and I worked my ass off. Today I feel none of it - plus I have a clean car, food in the freezer, clean dishes, clean laundry, and delicious fruit crumble.

Tomorrow, I think I will send the boys off - let them have some fun (after washing diapers at the laundromat) while I do my little de-clutter. Not that I know where to start... I just know that there are bits of me that aren't being realised. There are things I know I could be doing more efficiently, and I KNOW we need to sort out some kind of routine. So perhaps we start there and see what happens.

Oh and hope - well, I just hope that the world holds itself together long enough for us to get a few details figured out. We've been talking more about places we might like to live that aren't the city. I like that talk, talk of a future that is bigger than we are now.

the good and the bad

My life's been running me through the ringer again. These weeks suck, especially in retrospect. Every mistake magnified, pushing aside all the great bits. At times like these I like to make two lists, a list of those things I am most grateful for and one of those things I wish to leave behind.

the good
my tummy is full of yummy, nutritous food
my home is warm and dry
my family is safe
I've been embroidering
I have access to great resources
my kids are patient and cute
rubber boots
finally saw the business of being born (for free! online!!)
my begonia is still alive
my veggies are sprouting
in fact, my yarn is kickin' ass
I like the new Chatelaine
the very awesome and daring Natasha Kogan
the folks that are fighting for insite
cooking at home isn't so tough
I have an appointment with my therapist today (but it is our next to last)
my camera is repaired, and at no cost to us!

the not-so-good
I have too many projects on the go
I feel like my period is never coming and I will just be PMS'd to death
I blew my first one week challenge pretty dramatically
we're broke, like the kind of broke that leaves me wondering if we get coffee or TP this week
my son is in full three-year-old destructo-child mode

on immunizations

With Rigby's first visit to the doctor came that now-important question of immunization. The waiting room was littered with pro-vaccine propaganda, but the doctor herself was helpful and open to the idea of a delayed schedule. It was during that discussion I realised I did not know nearly as much as I should about the issues. There are a lot of issues to consider.

Coincidentally, earlier this week I picked up a copy of Brain, Child and it features an article by a scientist mother The Needle and the Damage Done, that explores some of the issues. After reading it I'm inspired to read the Sears book on vaccinations (The Vaccine Book: Making the Right Decision for Your Child) and am filled with relief that this question isn't an easy one for so many of us.

When vaccinating my first, I was pretty trusting of the establishment. He followed the schedule until we left Calgary* at which time so many questions had begun popping up in my head. My trust of most control systems was fading and the idea that my interests were often not the ones being served was blossoming. Now open, my eyes will not shut. As hard as I might wish.

So I am left with more questions and no answers, but at least I feel like I am gaining some ideas.

*Sebastian has had all but one shot - his last experience with that vaccine was unpleasant and frightening (though far from perilous), we are eventually going to get him up to date, but at this point we feel comfortable with his assumed immunities.

swamped

There's a whole lot going on here at casa del forsyth, including the formulation of a business plan based on an idea thought up yesterday on the loo, the ever-required planning and organizing that go along with running of a home, swap projects to start, finish and mail, a zine to put together, an embroidery project that I am doing along with another craft dabbler, a bagel recipe to try, and today, Rigby's first doctor's visit.

The sun is shining and I have been taking it pretty easy (all things considered) - my garden is sprouting and there are already tiny green berry nubs on my two strawberry plants. Our landlords installed a fence out back and this weekend they'll put in the gate - it only took one short escape by Sebastian for them to get on it.

My one week challenge is not going as well as I had hoped - but we have been very conscious of what we're eating and why. My slip ups have been of the pretty mundane variety - a salad bought at Capers* after a skipped lunch, too many coffees, and one very delicious wheat-free granola bar from a neighbourhood cafe.

Now I am off once again, Andrew needs to stay at work tonight - so I am dropping Sebastian off with him for a bit while I go meet our new doctor.

*our dear, local, frou-frou-chi-chi market has recently merged with Whole Foods - BOOOO

guests, invited and uninvited.

It has been a wacky day. We've had a string of these, some leaving us reeling, some leaving us exhausted, some leaving us completely satisfied and some accomplishing all three. These are the days we'll cherish. Today, more than most, strikes me as the type of day we'll look back on when we're wrinkly.

This morning began slowly. My happy daughter and I stayed in bed for hours, sleeping and snuggling, singing and laughing. Around 9:30, I slid out of bed. Rigby played happily in her seat, enjoying the warm steam from my long, hot shower. She then watched me clean the house in preparation for the evening's guests. Finally falling asleep to the hum of the vacuum.

I didn't get as much work done as I think I should have, but I certainly did more than I would on any other day. Besides, I had just done my monthly cupboard clean *and* the budget. So I did some "internetting", essentially, I sat at my computer checking websites to see if anything new and interesting was up. I added a few more pages to del.icio.us, I talked on the phone, I did my hair (though sadly, not my makeup), I cleaned the void normally filled with Sebastian's car seat, I got bags ready for Sebastian's karate class and my therapy appointment, I sorted out what needed to be done before dinner time and I got us into the car to run errands before it was time to get Sebastian from his sleep-over.

As I slid the keys into the ignition, I saw the dog. A small-breed dog, with no human and no tags, sniffing the grass. I almost drove off, but instead I got out of the car and walked up to the little guy. He was frightened, but friendly and came to me with a little coaxing. The only identification he carried was a tag confirming he'd had a rabies shot. I called the vet's office and the woman on the phone took my number to call the owner they had on file, but the owner did not pick up nor did they have an answering machine, I left my number with the vet and got back in the car, this time with a second passenger.

Now running late, I got the (very well-behaved) dog into the car and drove across town to pick up Sebastian. On the way I picked up a gas-station coffee and a chocolate bar. The dog was a hit with Sebastian, a few concerns about the pointy teeth ("Mom, maybe he was sharp teeth?") and his general distrust of most things furry, but the dog's friendly and calm demeanor quickly won him over. The four of us raced back to town, Sebastian asking a battery of dog-related questions, me eating a fast-food meal (which incidentally, was pretty yummy), and Rigby growing more and more agitated over not being fed immediately. We were supposed to be home close to 2:00 to meet Andrew and head to therapy.

hunger, having tuned out her When we pulled up, Andrew came out and climbed in the car. I'd actually forgotten Rigby'sscreaming 15 minutes before. We made it down the whole block before I realised what we'd done. I dropped Andrew off to check out another house that he knew to own a small dog. Back at our house, Sebastian declared that he did not want to go inside with me, then requested that I also stay outside. It was a nice day so I agreed and nursed Rigby in the front seat. We chatted more about the lost dog and then about his upcoming karate class. Child was so pumped.

Back on the road, Sebastian sat with the puppy in his lap (temporary name: Arthur - Sebastian wanted to name it Sebastian-Dog, but I managed to sell him on something less confusing). Arthur was happy to be pet, he strikes me as a very easygoing dog, used to the love of small children.

My therapy session went well, though I found out it would be my second to last and that fills me with some sadness. Andrew and Sebastian were not as lucky. Seems I miscalculated and the class doesn't start until next week. Making the most of a break in the rain, Andrew, Arthur and Sebastian played in a feild before picking me up from the hospital.

On the way home we stopped for some simultaneous errands. Rigby and I hit the grocery store for dinner fixings while the boys got wine and checked out a family eyeglass place. The optician pimped out Sebastian's specs with rubber ear "hooks" and silicone nose pads, and Andrew found the funky eye patches I'd been on about. Sebastian can now choose between camo print, cars and planes, stars and rockets, or sports balls - making this long-assed process a wee bit more fun*. We've not been as diligent as we ought to be as the responsible parents of a kid with eye problems, but from what I hear, slip-ups can be common.

Our dinner was lovely and we all marveled at our adorable and uninvited guest. The kids were rough around the edges, hungry and tired long before dinner hit the table. But we managed to make it all the way to ice cream without major incident. Dinner was simple and delicious, noodles with pesto, goat feta, grape tomatoes and olives, and a grain-filled, soft baguette with fresh hummus. Dessert, which did not make it out of the oven until Sebastian was in bed, was a delicious apple crisp Aly put together - served with vanilla ice cream (soy for me) and a raspberry and strawberry sauce.

I'm feeling pretty fat and happy. The dishes will keep until morning, as much as it pains me to leave them. Tomorrow will be another full day, something I am beginning to accept as my new normal.

*Just now I came across these fabric patches and I think I may try to make one for Sebastian.

be the change

This mothering thing is hard. One minutes you think you've got it and then something happens and the rules of the game change.

I, for my part, have been hard at work on myself. I have learned so much in this past short while, my son and daughter are excellent teachers.

I apologise for my recent internet absence, I don't know when or if I will return to "blogging" nor do I know what it will look like when/if I do. I do know that right now is a really amazing and changing time for me, full of glorious highs and difficult lows.

This has been a really incredible month - an incredibly challenging and rewarding month. It is with great sadness that I say farewell to my therapy group. I have been blessed to share a special connection with five other amazing women. It is with great joy that I begin to reconnect with my friends and my life outside of the house. Even the friends who think (erroneously) that time spent with them is nothing more than a drain because of the challenges they're facing.

I am learning so much right now, I get the sense that I am shedding my skin and becoming something more. All my past, all my mistakes and trials have led me to this spot - I am beginning to forgive and understand, not just in my mind, but in my soul. I am also beginning to see more clearly what my role as parent really is (guide), as opposed to what I think it is supposed to be (trainer).

There is still so much to learn, but the path is long and I have time. Knowing who I want to be and where I want to be is only a small part of this, I can't believe it took me until now to see that. The larger part is being the person I want to be. Acting with integrity and faith in myself.

Who knew it was so simple? Who knew it could be so hard?

check out what we've been up to lately on flickr

my wee baby

She just rolled over (the first time I've witnessed it, but it has happened in my absence once before) and let out the biggest, burliest burp. Followed by a series of farts.

I love babies!!

rolling, rolling, rolling

I've been up and down and up and down lately. It sounds like a lot more fun than it actually is.

I am one of those unlucky few breastfeeding mothers who doesn't get a post-partum break from periods, nor did it help me lose any weight last time around. Jury's still out this time around, but it isn't looking great. So last week was punctuated by an intense bout of PMS. Plus our favourite family hang-out was still closed for renos, AND we were in post-holiday recovery mode. I am surprised we made it through the week relatively unscathed. I managed to lose it on both my son and my husband - all the while a voice screaming in my head that "my anxiety is creating exactly the situations I am trying to avoid. Stop it!"

I think that means I'm growing.

I have been having wonderful conversations with people. Wonderful, helpful, engaging, interesting and enlightening. I've been giving myself permission to run off and spend time with friends and family without my kids in tow (or without both kids) - I am fraught with feelings of guilt over abandoning them, but its weight is slowing me down less every time I walk out the door.

Today I left my kids and husband at home and enjoyed a lunch and shopping trip with my friend Shannon. She and I are crazy-similar, so our meetings are always full of drama, soap-boxing, challenges and lots and lots of laughter. We went shopping after lunch and I found a couple more things to send off to my very patient swap partner. I feel so bad about missing the date that I really want this package to rock her socks. Plus I'm hoping to take her up on an offer to stay a night when I go on my journey to Portland.

That's right, this girl (and her little girl) are going on a road-trip in April to see Elizabeth Gilbert in Portland. We're driving straight there, then we have three days to wander home. This is a totally indulgent trip, I hope it will allow me some time to connect with myself and experience something outside of normal. My husband and father are supporting me financially (Dad), physically (Andrew) and emotionally, and without that support this would not happen. I've been sitting on the idea for a few days, letting it sink in, and while some anxiety has creeped up over it, it has only barely dulled the excitement (perhaps to a more realistic point) and I still want to go and I still want to go alone. I've begun telling people about it. Strangers, mostly. The guy at the bookstore who mentioned her coming to Vancouver (it was sold out) and got the ball rolling, the waitress who commented on the book (which I had just gifted to my friend Shannon - purchased used from said bookstore), you...

In other news, I had my first CBT session yesterday. It was great. I like my therapist and the fact that I was able to find a sitter for Sebastian. I came away from our initial meeting with a couple of small goals, a little more insight into my thinking, and a lot of resources. I see her again in two weeks, she thinks she can get me some extra sessions (I'd normally get 5-8) if I agree to be filmed for a provincial training program (she said I'd be "great" for it - I am choosing to take that to mean she thinks I am personable and eloquent (chatty) and not that I am so nuts I'd make a great case study). I'll also start group therapy soon - as long as I can get 8 weeks of mid-day childcare... I do think it is possible.

Hang on - I just remembered I want to put another coat of paint on Sebastian's closet doors while he's out.

We are now once more coat of yellow and two coats of blue and brown away from having his room finished. This has been one long, drawn-out project, which we will likely continue to change and tweak (glowing stars, anyone? little flowers? woodland creatures?) - but it is nearly done. His room is now home to a four-wall mural depicting a nice Dick Bruna-esque outdoor scene. It makes me think of the line from Where the Wild Things Are where "his ceiling hung with vines, and the walls became the world all around." I'll post photos when it is done *and* we have a decently sunny day.

catching up, clearing out

I've been on a cleaning and culling rampage. I've been ruthless in my drive to clear our tiny apartment of unnecessary clutter, ridding my life of those mountains of miscellany that threaten to drown us.

Case in point, we haven't filed our '06 taxes yet. I didn't even realise it until our mid-month child tax benefit money stopped showing up in our bank account. Yeah, this is just one of the reasons I laugh when people accuse me of being really organised. Anal? Yes. Organised? No.

It was a process to get our information updated with various government agencies, but one I am glad we finally got done. In all of our moving about we'd downright confused pretty much everyone to the point where *we* stopped being able to recall our own post code, phone numbers and address. Next time we move (fingers crossed, it will be a good couple of years) we will remember to take care of all that crap right off the bat. Not that I adore everyone we owe money to knowing how to find us, but it is better than not knowing we have a problem because no one has been able to reach us. I discovered, in the process, that one of my student loans is nearly paid off! Score!

Another window into my utter lack of organisational skills is the delay between my daughter's birth and the mailing of her registration of birth. I rock. Oh and there's the gift swap I totally flaked on that I am now scrambling to finish and send off (it'll be extra-special, because I feel like an ass, plus my swapee is an awesome woman who deserves a super special gift).

To make me feel even assier, and also wonderful and loved, I received a gift from my partner this morning. A gorgeous set of bug-themed wine-glass charms, inspired by my ladybug visit the day before Rigby was born, with a wish for "many more lovely encounters with harmless bugs." Also in the package was a great hair-tie, a egg-shaped shaker from her daughter to Sebastian, a very nice card and two really neat magnets made from peel&stick magnet paper and found images. She even threw in some blank magnets for me to play with!! I'll be saving them for something inspired.

Ahhh - my mama-sense was tingling and I made it to the bedroom what I can only assume was moments before my son made another attempt at putting on makeup*. He found my box of crap from last year's misguided decision to become a Mary-Kay consultant (oh, I shit you not) and was playing with a sample card. The box will likely be gone by the weekend as I get it and everything else posted free and cheap on craigslist. Someone is coming by on Friday to take the most annoying set of toys** that has ever lived in our house. Well, maybe not *the* most annoying, there was that singing bunny:



But anyways, the cleaning. It is making me mad, driving me absolutely batty, keeping me up at night (a little). Last night I was writing a list and at the bottom added the lines: "I should be sleeping, but here I am, up making lists," and "Stop thinking things through to their improbable conclusions." The first one is obvious, the second not so much. It came after I again had a fantasy of fame and fortune as a result of pluck and serendipity. I get those a lot. I go just as far with bad things, envisioning my son as a burly biker, starting fights for kicks when he does something like today's stand-off over the climbing toy in the mall play-pit.

*The first attempt was last week, shortly before heading out with friends for the morning, when he dug into my brand new waterproof mascara and got it all over his face. Later, we discovered he'd actually managed to put it in the right place too - with his glasses on we couldn't tell, but when they came off for the night, sure enough his eye lashes were clumped with the stuff. Frankly I'm proud of him, putting mascara on properly is hard, and from the smudges on his frames, he didn't even remove his glasses to do it. I keep my mascara and most makeup up high now.

**Don't click this unless you hate me already.

highs and lows

first a grand happy holidays!

To catch up on the blur that was December I won't bore you (or push my luck) by writing a long-assed update, instead here's a rundown of the highs and lows:

+ Christmas went really well
- Sebastian woke up at 11:30pm with a croupy cough.
+ This is his first really terrible cough, ever.
- The stomach flu we all got a week and a half ago.
+ I still got all my holiday baking done and it looked awesome!
- The package my mom sent us seems to be AWOL.
+ Eggnog is awesome with rum.
+ Same goes for Bailey's and coffee.
+ Time to finish this list (finally) while Andrew and Sebastian play with trains and while Rigby naps.
- Andrew goes back to work tomorrow for 2-5 8-12 hour days.
+ He gets all of next week off and if he works over the weekend, he also gets some killer overtime.
- We did really well, but still overspent at Christmas (how???).
+ Not shopping on Boxing Day.
- Not having any money to shop on Boxing Day.
+ Xmas in Frisco on SomaFM on iTunes - "not for the easily offended". Right now it is playing Merry Muthaphuckin' X-mas by Easy-e.
+ We all slept in this morning.
+ Tonight, when the kids are tucked in, Andrew and I will curl up with spiked egg nog and finish watching Papillon. If we don't pass out we will then start watching the original Thomas Crown Affair.
+ I have a crush on Steve McQueen.
+ Sometime soon, the final gift from my dad to my husband will arrive (seasons 2&3 of this) and we will spend many nights watching hot 70's ass.


And finally, a video that brings together the Prez and John Lennon with creepy results. There is one clip in particular that makes me cry every time I watch it.



special thanks to Shauna and idolator

sick day

Andrew woke me up this morning at 5:00 informing me that he'd been up most of the night puking. Sebastian then woke up at 6:30 with an explosive poopy diaper, meanwhile I still needed to nurse and change Rigby. And I am so not a morning person. Think of your favourite zombie movie, that's me before 8:00am. That's why I married a morning person, so he could deal with things until I was lucid... that plan falls apart, however, when he's sick.

So - the TV went on - three adventures with the Backyardiagans and then Sebastian and I headed to the store for gravol, ginger-ale and soup. We came home and since I wasn't sure if the rest of us would be carrying icky GI germs, we all stayed at home. That didn't work out so well, though, since Sebastian just wanted to play with dad and I resented having another person to take care of. So the kids and I packed up the stroller and hit a playground.

There we met a young boy and his dad, I have to say I *love* stay-home dads, I find them so much easier to befriend. Sebastian and this young chap played so well together it was almost astounding. The boy was about 6 months older than Boo and really cool. I found out the Montessori preschool by the park is great, but doesn't have a part-time program... we're thinking preschool soonish, though I am having some trouble committing to a solid time frame.

After the park we hit the cafe for a muffin and steamed milk (coffee for me) and warmed up before starting home. I had hoped to pile some more errands onto that trip, but was already pushing back Sebastian's nap and I could tell he was getting close to falling asleep on his feet.

Now he's in bed, he fell asleep moments after climbing under the covers, Andrew is still sleeping (despite claiming to be getting up) and Rigby is also dozing quietly in her stroller. I have piles of backed up work and cleaning to do, but I just feel drained and all I want to do is rest a moment before feeding the teeny one and running back out the door to complete errands before friends come to visit.

I shouldn't complain, Andrew rarely gets this sick and he has taken care of me so much over the last two months, and for that I am really grateful. I just resent the ease with which he can take a sick day.

cook, eat, play, clean, cook, eat, clean, cook, eat, sleep, repeat

Today we ventured out of the house. Originally the plan had been to visit the family centre - but by the time we were ready to walk out the door it was almost snack time. I convinced Sebastian that a trip to the coffee shop and park could be just as exciting. The promise of a blueberry bran muffin tipped the scales.

Sebastian jumped into each and every puddle we came across, and it is fall in Vancouver, so you know there are plenty. I didn't mind at all, he was snug in his new rain outfit and I had a stash of towels in the stroller, just in case. Rigby enjoyed her first walk... well, I assume she did, she spent most of the trip asleep in her stroller bubble and didn't make a fuss until we left the park. The coffee shop was a big hit - and despite the rain we were able to sit outside quite comfortably (lucky, since the cafe was packed to the hilt and I had ordered my coffee and our muffin to stay). We chatted abut the things we saw - I explained that pigeons were not welcome in coffee shops, Sebastian explained that dogs do not eat people (?). I'd hoped to sneak back home without the promised trip to the park - our very lovely walk to the coffee shop having taken about three times as long as I had thought it would. I have to remind myself often that he's not so little any more and remembers things. I didn't mind, really, I had dressed us all well and none of us were uncomfortable or crabby, yet. Once at the park Sebastian got over his disappointment that there were no other kids present when he made the thrilling discovery that his waterproof pants, combined with the plastic slide and rain made for a very exciting ride. He was also happy to have my (nearly) undivided attention for a while.

We were having a ball and ended up staying out just a wee bit too long, on the way back Sebastian decided he was not going to be able to walk the entire distance home and Rigby wailed for a good five blocks, it started to really rain as we walked home and I ended up briskly pushing the stroller as Sebastian rode my shoulders. I then hit a point, a block from home, where I didn't think I would make it. Luckily, Sebastian had gotten his second wind and was willing to complete the last leg of our journey under his own steam. We came home, tired, wet, hungry and more than a little crabby - but we'd had fun, and more than that, with the knowledge that we could do it.

And now, my husband just walked in the door with ice cream, dark chocolate, diet pepsi, bread, dip and wine (yeah baby) to make up for the three HOURS of laundry in our manual washer... I was feeling pretty pissy earlier - I'm now feeling much better (and the venomous thoughts about my husband have almost completely faded away... though the fart stink he just left a few feet away from me and the fact that I lost the original conclusion to this post because I had signed into his gmail by his request, giving blogger a brain-fart, have brought back a tiny bit of venom). Nothing a nice back rub wouldn't fix.

I have some relevant photos to post - but because I am too lazy to find both my camera and camera cord - I will leave you with the *promise* of photos to come.